an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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