I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
babies were throwing up all over the place
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.