So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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