Walk of Shame. In a state park.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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