I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
