Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
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