My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
