he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize