i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Randomize
