I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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