didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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