We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
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