Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
