i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
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