I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
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I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
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There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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