Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
