Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
