This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
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