she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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