I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
