Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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