white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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