so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize