mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize