I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize
