I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
