I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize