plz talk dirty to me
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Randomize