all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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