I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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