Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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