How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
