Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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