But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
