I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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