anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
