How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
