PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Randomize
