Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Randomize