We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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