Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
