NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
