if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I just got carded by a ten year old.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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