sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
