I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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