in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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