first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
