so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Randomize
