Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
