That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Randomize
