I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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