Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
